The Bourne Ultimat…ely Shaking Camera
Went to see The Bourne Ultimatum last night with Grem and Missy, courtesy of Sam who is the manager at the Phipp’s Plaza AMC. It’s always awesome to have a friend that can get you free movie passes. The theater was sold to capacity, and unfortunately we had to sit in the 2nd to front row, over to the right. Not the greatest viewing angle. This will come back in a few moments. Also, the air conditioning was broken. So imagine, if you will, a theater with every seat filled, feeling like a sauna, and trying to watch a screen from a viewpoint that causes it to appear distorted.
The movie started off pretty strong. Cool action, lots of spy stuff. Some cool fighing. Reminiscent of the other Bourne movies, but done even better in my opinion. Well, after the first few scenes, I started getting nauseas. I soon realized why (in addition to the vantage point and heat): the camerawork.
I think they were going for the gritty, in-the-middle-of-the-action feeling with the shaky camera, panning around and zooming in and out randomly. After just a few minutes, I figured out their secret: they found an epileptic monkey, strapped a camera to its right hand, and had trained it follow the action. The one thing they didn’t account for is that the epileptic monkey was also a compulsive masturbator. Because seriously, I swear this movie was filmed by an epileptic, masturbating monkey with a camera strapped to its hand.
Needless to say, I spent much of the movie with my eyes closed to avoid losing my dinner. But the movie was good. I think.